If you want to improve your dating life, you NEED to know how to talk to girls.
“Pick-up” lines and pre-rehearsed stories will only get you so far. Without the right tools, you will never make it past boring small talk.
In this article I’ll teach you 9 keys for charming her, getting her out on a date, and making the move. It doesn’t matter if you want a girlfriend or a hook-up, these tips will get the job done.
PHASE I: How to Make the Move
In the video above I demonstrate tips #1-3 on random girls in the street.
#1: Do Not Hesitate
Listen up, because here is the secret to never getting stuck in the friend-zone…
When you notice a girl you’re attracted to, go ahead and make the move. Otherwise you will procrastinate and give up. And even if you do work up the courage to ask her out later on, she will be more likely to see you as “just a friend”.
#2: Be Direct
So, what exactly is the best way to ask a girl out?
Simple. Be honest and state your intentions. Don’t worry about being super flirty or getting her “attracted”, just ask the fucking question…
“Do you want to hang out sometime?”
And also, make it OBVIOUS why you want to hang out with her. Let her know you aren’t looking for another friend…
“I know this is random, but I think you’re really cute. Do you want to hang out sometime?”
Stop worrying about waiting for the “perfect” time, because it will never come. Instead, face your fears now. She will appreciate your boldness. And you will build self-confidence regardless of her answer.
#3: Embrace Rejection
Look man, all of us are afraid of failing and getting rejected. That shit hurts.
But think about it like THIS…
You will NEVER regret putting yourself out there and getting rejected. At least now you know that she is not into you. You can move on with your life.
However, you will ALWAYS regret not even trying in the first place. You will never know if she was actually attracted to you. You will never know the experiences you might have shared.
PHASE II: Effective Text Game
In this video I go in-depth on how to text girls for maximum results.
#1: Text Her Immediately
Okay, let’s imagine that you ask her out and get her number. What’s next?
Most guys wait a day or two before they text… but this is a HUGE mistake.
You want to capitalize on your momentum and set up the date as fast as possible. Otherwise the spark may fade or she may make plans with a new guy she meets.
A simple, “Hey Julia, this is David” message is enough to get the conversation started.
#2: Keep the Goal in Mind
Another big mistake guys make is getting stuck in long text conversations.
You might think you’re doing well because she’s responding, but really you’re just showering her with validation and becoming another texting buddy in her phone.
Always remember your #1 goal: make a plan to meet in person. This is where you will flirt with her and find out if there’s a connection… not via text messages.
Keep small talk to a minimum before the date. After she answers your first text, only send 2-3 more messages before you start planning the date.
#3: Make Concrete Plans
When you schedule a date via text, you want to make sure you are both on the same page.
Here are 3 easy steps for making plans…
- Get her to commit again: “Do you want to hang out sometime this week?”
- Find a day: “What nights are you free?”
- Suggest a plan: “Let’s meet at X bar for drinks. Does 8 or 9 work for you?”
At this point, you have successfully scheduled a date.
I recommend getting drinks for the first date, because it’s cheaper and less time investment than dinner or most other ideas. Plus, sitting side-by-side at a bar is an easy, low pressure environment for chatting and flirting.
PHASE III: The First Date Blueprint
If you want to learn even more about my first date gameplan, watch the video above.
#1: Confirm, Confirm, Confirm
If you don’t confirm your date, there is a high chance of flaking.
Humans are creatures of habit. If we can find an excuse to avoid attending an event, there’s a good chance we’ll take it. And girls are no exception to this rule.
You need to check-in and confirm the date MULTIPLE times…
- The night before: “Hey Julia, hope your weeks going well. We still good for tomorrow at 9?”
- And again the afternoon of the date: “Hey see you at 9 tonight”
Following up is so crucial because it makes the plan feel REAL in her mind. It also makes it harder for her to justify being lazing and flaking. By simply sending these 2 messages, you will almost guarantee she shows up.
#2: Hug Her Immediately
First impressions are crucial — wear a sharp outfit and hug her as soon as she arrives.
Don’t hesitate and wait to see what she’s going to do. Don’t give her a handshake. Take the lead and get the date started on the right foot. This will avoid awkwardness and make both of you feel comfortable together.
I know this sounds basic, but honestly getting the small stuff right is more than half the battle. Put yourself in a good position to succeed, and the rest of the night will be easy.
#3: Keep the Conversation Focused on Her
Ok, so what are some easy conversation topics you can use on the date?
Simple. Keep the majority of the conversation focused on her…
- Find out what she is passionate about
- Discover her most exciting stories
- Make guesses what shes likes (in a flirtatious way)
When you consistently drive the conversation towards her, it makes it a lot easier to think of things to say. Plus, people love talking about themselves so it will be fun and engaging for her as well.
RECAP: How to Talk to Girls
The best way to talk to girls is to be honest and keep things moving forward.
You should always ask her out as soon as possible to steer clear of the friend-zone and avoid wasting your time. When texting, always set the date up as soon as possible so you can actually hang out with her in person.
And finally, when you’re on the date, keep the conversation focused on her passions and experiences. She will love talking about herself, and also quickly become curious about you.